I decided it was time to have a chat with school. Again. As I explained my prior request that my child not be given beef or hotdogs, the administrator simply acted polite while looking at me as if I had two heads.
You know, having two heads is a rare, but naturally occurring mutation. Nothing like, say, goats that excrete spider silk material with their milk, pigs that contain worm genes or glow in the dark, or salmon that grow twice as fast as normal because they have eel DNA. Some of which, could end up in our food supply WITH NO LABEL on it according to the proposed FDA ruling.
Of course, if I tried to explain this to the school, no doubt they would be calling Child Protective Services on me for being nuts. Because it does sound crazy. Like something out of a bad science fiction movie. Only scarier because it's real.
No worries, though, the FDA is going to examine each new engineered animal and oversee the whole thing completely. This is the same FDA who is understaffed, underfunded, ineffective and can only examine less than ONE PERCENT of food and drug imports to the U.S.
Of the ONE PERCENT of imported food and drugs, here's just some of what was found:
- Melamine-tainted pet food
- Prunes tinted with chemical dyes not approved for human consumption
- Frozen shrimp preserved an antibacterial that can cause cancer
- Poisonous swordfish
- Dried apples preserved with a cancer-causing chemical
The school sent home this handy dandy form for me to complete, where I explain what foods my child is not allowed to be given and WHY. I am a bit stuck on the why.
We're a ways off from "worm chops" showing up as an entree, but I have a few more current reservations over good old beef, even if it is not cloned (which the FDA has ruled as safe and won't be labeled either).
The form gives me just two lines in which to explain my thoughts on the subject. Here goes:
Because of the largest recall of beef ever using downer cattle with unknown ailments that was fed to school children prior to the recall. Because of an ever-increasing contamination rate of the deadly E. coli 0157 that will only get worse with the rising grain costs spurring the practice of feeding cattle ethanol distiller grains which makes them bang their heads against the fence repeatedly, and may result in these magnesium-deprived animals being hard to tell apart from true madcow-infected animals. Because it's not likely an infected cow would get tested anyway since only .11 percent (that is POINT-11, not 11 percent, or only 110 cattle out of 100,000) of cattle are actually tested for mad cow due to cost cutbacks, and a recent ruling banned a farmer from testing all of his cows for the disease as it would cause an "unfair market advantage" to actually be selling beef known to be safe.Hmm. That isn't going to fit on the handy form's two lines. How about:
Because I said so, damnit. And I am not crazy.