Thursday Thirteen: Things I never thought I would say

Then I became a parent.

1. Are you eating rocks?!!
2. Please don't poop in the bathtub.
3. Goat food is for goats, not us.
4. That? That's Mommy's fat roll.
5. That's right! Bird poop is nasty and we don't touch it.
6. Hello? Poison Control? Okay, please don't laugh ...
7. You know, I actually like peas now.
8. Can Mommy have her ice cream cone back? Please? Please?
   
9. Honey, the cat doesn't need a binky.
10. Okay, princesses or race cars today? Race cars? Good.
11. Hmmm, the pureed prunes aren't bad. But the green bean mush tastes like dirt.
12. What did you eat?! Was that a crayon? Okay, now where's the marble?
13. Why are you washing your hands in the toilet?!